Shame:

 

Shame is a central human experience.

 

Here’s what shame looks like:

 

  • Telling yourself, “I’m inferior. I’m defective. I’m a failure.”

 

  • Feeling rejected or alienated from others.

 

  • Believing that your “defects” are exposed, and that people are thinking negatively about you.

 

  • Covering yourself with masks that don’t fit who you really are.

 

  • Wishing you could be recognized, accepted and validated for who you really are.

 

Together we will get at the roots of your thoughts and feelings so that we can find ways to overcome them. On the other side of what you’re experiencing is self-acceptance and self-esteem.

Depression, Sadness, and Hopelessness:

 

When these feelings take over, there’s a dark cloud over your daily life.

 

If you’re experiencing:

 

  • Self-hatred or believing you’re not worthy of being loved.

  • Fear of losing approval, recognition or love from people you care about.

 

Or if you are:

 

  • Punishing yourself for not being perfect.

  • Believing things won’t get better.

  • Thinking you’re a failure if you don’t meet incredibly high standards.

 

We can find explanations for why you think, behave, and feel the way you do. Together, We can understand where these emotions come from, and set realistic expectations that you can meet and feel proud of. Once you understand the mistaken foundations of your beliefs, you can find relief from that relentless pain.

 

Relationships:

 

You want satisfying and close relationships, but something gets in your way. You ask yourself:

 

  • Why does everybody reject me?

  • Why am I so worried about being abandoned?

  • Why do the people I love run away when I try hardest to keep them close?

  • Why do I never know what I want in a relationship?

  • What are my needs in a relationship?

  • How can I remain myself in a relationship?

  • Why I am worried about losing my identity when I am in a relationship?

  • Why do I always feel I am too close or too far from another person? What is the perfect distance between two people?

  • Why do I run away from a relationship as soon as I see even one red flag and then I regret my decision?

  • Why do other people perceive me as needy?

  • Why are other people feel overwhelmed by the emotions I throw at them? How can I control or filter these emotions?

 

Together we will answer all of the questions you’ve never found satisfying answers for. We will dig into your past to discover and find out how it got created. We will use that awareness to build another way for you to handle relationships. Through this process, you CAN feel happy and satisfied again.

Grief and Loss:

 

When you experience a big loss, you may experience many things:

 

  • Feelings of fear, anxiety, sadness, longing, yearning, guilt, regret and anger about the loss.

 

  • Confusing feelings, like a sense of meaninglessness, or a sense of relief.

 

  • Bouncing between different thoughts and feelings: from, “there’s nothing I can do about it” to “it’s my fault, I could have done more” or from “she had a good life” to “it wasn’t her time.”

 

  • Surprising behaviors, from crying to laughter, and from sharing feelings to engaging silently in activities like cleaning, writing, or exercising.

 

  • Preoccupation with the deceased or with the circumstances surrounding the death or avoidance of reminders of the deceased.

 

  • Feelings of emptiness or meaninglessness.

 

  • Difficulty engaging in happy memories.

 

  • Lack of desire in pursuing personal interests or plans.

 

It can be hard to talk about your grief, and often even well meaning friends say hurtful things. In therapy, you can share ALL of your thoughts and feelings, explore the lost relationship, and make sense of the big life questions grief brings up.

 

Identity & Life Transitions:

 

There are moments in life where it is difficult to understand who we are and what we want. When you’re in a transition like becoming an adult, moving, retiring from a job, changing your workplace, or ending a significant relationship, you may experience:

 

  • Feeling lost, as if your sense of identity is unclear.

 

  • Trying to “find” yourself again by wearing different hats, but discovering no hat fits you perfectly.

 

  • Loss, confusion, sadness, and awkwardness.

 

  • Taking multiple actions and engaging in risky or harmful behaviors just to cope.

 

  • Trying your old coping skills and finding they don’t work any more.

 

  • Feeling tired and hopeless about your future.

 

Together we can make sense of the transition you are going through. We can find who you truly are and find ways to cope with the crisis you are experiencing. I will help you become your own best friend and express your true Self.

Stress, anxiety, and, overwhelming thoughts:

 

Sometimes life feels like more than you can handle.

You may feel:

 

  • Tense, worried, on edge

 

  • Irritable, restless

 

  • Under pressure

 

  • Unable to focus and concentrate

 

You may observe that your anxiety is having repercussions in your work, school, relationships and you are avoiding situations or activities you used to enjoy. You may also have tried solutions that didn't go well.

 

In therapy, we will develop your awareness around what triggers these feelings and the reasons hidden beneath these unwanted and painful emotions. We will use this awareness to develop tools you can use to overcome them.

Sex and Sexuality, Gender, Sexual Orientation:

 

Do you experience any of this?

 

  • Identity confusion.

 

  • Sexual stigma of living as a sexual minority.

 

  • Shame about who you are.

 

  • Coping with discrimination and oppression.

 

  • Issues in romantic relationships.

 

  • Worries related to coming out to your family or friends.

 

  • Social rejection.

 

  • A sense of confusion or inadequacy.

 

In therapy, we will address these issues and find ways to help you feel confort and pride in your identity. You'll understand that there is nothing wrong with you, that you are worthy, and that there is a place in the world where you can feel safe and accepted.

Substance Abuse:

(employing both harm reduction and abstinence based techniques)

 

Do you experience any of this?

  • You lost control over your life, job, and relationship.

  • You wonder how and why you ended up in this situation.

  • You don't know you're doing what you're doing.

  • You ask yourself: "Why me?".

  • You have no idea how to stop.

  • You can not handle overwhelming emotions anymore.

 

Together we can explore:

 

  • the meaning, function, and consequence of your substance abuse,

  • which negative emotions you are trying to flee from,

  • how your substance abuse fits your personality and your relationship pattern,

  • how to assume a more warm, acceptable, flexible attitude toward yourself,

  • how to overcome your weaknesses and inadequacies in dealing with life events,

  • and which internal wounds you are trying to medicate by yourself.

Adolescence:

(Body, emotional, social changes)

 

Here is what you may be experiencing:

 

  • Coflicts with peers and within the family

 

  • Struggling with anger, depression, acceptance, and adaptation

 

  • Looking for independence and finding your own place in the world.

 

  • Questions and doubts with Sexual development or Sexual Orientation.

 

  • Fear and worries related to Coming out.

 

  • Problems with school.

 

  • Difficulties at managing your impulses and behaviors.

 

  • Feeling alone and rejected.

 

  • Feeling indadequate and that everybody else is better than you.

 

I work with adolescents and young adults in both individual and family sessions in order to:

 

  • Understand the issues that motivate and influence the adolescent’s behavior, thoughts, and feelings.

 

  • Identify the adolescent’s typical behavioral pattern, defenses, and responses to conflicts and struggles.

 

  • Help the family in finding more positive and constructive ways to communicate providing support and education.

 

  • Verbalize feelings and conflicts in a safe and understanding way.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

What are my specialty areas of focus?

  • LinkedIn Social Icon
  • Google+ Social Icon